Now that parents and kids are all together, having to work on school assignments and job requirements from home, there are undoubtedly challenges that arise. First of all, do you even have enough bandwidth to sustain that many online users at once? Is your internet connection stable, or are you constantly getting disruptions in service? Are you having to do a web call with co-workers while your child is across the dining room table on a video conference lesson from school? All of that juggling of time, space, and bandwidth takes coordination, patience, and planning.
As parents, we are used to having to structure our lives around having to work and take care of a household. We must also schedule around our children and their various activities. When we are all constantly working from home, day after day, things can feel a little frustrating. That is understandable. It can feel like everyone is on top of each other all the time. Some of us may feel like we are unable to do anything as well as it needs to be done. Instead, we feel that despite our efforts in trying to hold it all together, many things are still falling apart. Our patience runs thin. We exhibit frustration with situations that we normally wouldn’t. We feel bad about that. It can become a cycle of negativity that doesn’t serve anyone well.
My first suggestion is to stop for a minute- and just breathe. Just take a few breaths and enjoy a quiet moment. You will get through this. Next, give yourself a break. Realize that the current situation is hard, stressful, exhausting, and nerve-wracking-for LOTS of people all over the world. Perfection is an impossible aspiration. None of us are perfect. All we can do is the best we can with what we’ve got, every day. That’s it. So, cut yourself some slack and realize that your best is good enough. Even that will fluctuate from day to day. Some days, you will feel on your game- managing everything with grace, kindness, and fortitude. Other days, you will feel you can’t do anything right- no matter how hard you try. Each day is a new chance to be the best YOU that you can be. Take what worked yesterday and celebrate that as a “win.” See what “wins” you can set up for yourself and your family the next day, and the day after that. Finally, ask for help. None of us can be rock stars at everything, every day. Be honest with yourself about what your challenges are. Find someone who can help you manage those challenges- a spouse, a child, a family member, a neighbor, a friend, a spiritual advisor, a counselor, an online support community- whatever. Find your people. Ask for help. Don’t allow yourself to feel bad about asking for help. It is not a sign of weakness. It is a sign of being human. Ask for help when you need it. Give help when you can. And remember to take every day one day at a time. I have a sign in my bedroom that my brother gave me. It says, “Make it through today.” That is all you really have to do- just one day at a time. Hang in there, breathe, and make it through today. You’ve got this!
In my next post, I will present some ideas about specific tools you can use to help organize your time, space, kids and commitments. Until then, be well!